Getting drunk on hand soap

My work gives me all kinds of new info.

You can get a DUI level alcohol reading from consistent use of antibacterial soap and Nyquil.

You can be positive for meth if you use Sudafed at recommended levels.

Good parents occasionally lock the cabinets and the fridge so kids can't get food.

Hot pants are appropriate court attire, especially if coupled with a long scarf and a bolero hat.

It is entirely acceptible desirable to keep your man from other's by Facebook threats, and even more so when you have been ordered to have no contact with that man by the family court judge who can and will take your child away permanently if you continue in the relationship.  Bonus points if the man brain damaged your infant and you can see it as "disciplining" a six month old.

Just some parenting thoughts for the new world.